Friday, October 12, 2012

Chapter One, Page Nine

"I had a wonderful morning with my person, we played Binky and also she asked me to sit down and stay in one place for quite some time. She likes to do this, so I humor her. However if I am outside, I refuse to play this game unless I'm quite bored. She left late in the afternoon and has not as of yet returned. This used to happen quit
e often and it never concerned me, but because of my recent suspicions that she is seeing another dog, I am on edge awaiting her return.
The yellow one seems to have become attached to the small person in the castle. He keeps hugging her and telling my person "This dog is cool". Foolish female...she should concentrate on her person instead of handing out attention so lavishly. But perhaps I shouldn't judge while my own situation is so uncertain.
I do not like this feeling. I am hoping we will spend the whole day together tomorrow, it would greatly ease my mind."

Chapter One, Page Eight

"It was very satisfying playing with the small persons last night, but twenty four hours of them is quite annoying. The only highlight of my day was the moment one of the little person puppies opened the door...I made a mad dash for the streets and led them all a merry chase. My person came home smelling of puppy. This concerns me.

She often smells of other dogs, but I tell myself it is only that a dog passed her by on the street and rubbed against her. Surely she would not betray me in this way, but I cannot help but wonder, is there another dog? Is she leading some kind of wild separate life? Is our relationship just a lie? I think on these things with a heavy heart, and I become sullen and angry and vow never to love her again. Then she calls to me with those sweet words, 'Bring me the binky, where is your Binky?' and my heart leaps for joy as all suspicion is forgotten. I will say this dear readers-

Love is not for the weak.

Your benevolent ruler, Boo Radley."

Chapter One, Page Seven

"No time to talk. House full of small persons willing to throw the Binky. Shall write in this diary in the morrow."

Thursday, October 11, 2012

Chapter One, Page Six

"My person and I drove to a place today where she gets things to eat and drink. There were many persons coming dangerously close to our wagon, but I thought about how we have been meeting more of them in the last few days, and not one has actually attempted to harm my person. Perhaps I have been a little excessive in my protective dut
ies. I decided not to growl or bark at anyone. She seemed very pleased by this. It is a good king who has happy subjects.

She also began bringing the lesser dogs and I our meals in separate banquet halls. I noticed my gruel this evening had a delicious oil on it that reminded me of seafood. I ate that part first. The yellow one ate all her food. If she is not careful she will lose her figure-females often do, especially since she has obviously given birth in her past and gravity has taken its toll in certain areas. In spite of this she is a very attractive female, and although I (strangely) have not felt any romantic feelings since last summer, I must admit to a certain amount of pride that such a fine specimen roams my yard and answers to me.
I noticed this morning a black dog approaching our fence. I ran to challenge him but the yellow one had already done so, slinging her head to the side daintily but putting out a very fierce bark. My person yelled at the both of us, so I quickly decided against joining the fray. It was a wise decision. I received many pats and back scratches, and I noticed my daily ration of bacon was today a full piece instead of the usual half.
It has been a lovely day, dear readers. I am quite fatigued, and leave you with a fond goodnight."

Chapter One, Page Five

"There is a terrible monster lurking in the wrinkled one's room. The little ones and I do not speak of it, but when my person makes the journey into that wing of the castle, my two diminutive subjects and I make haste for the spare room. Understand, readers-I do not FEAR the beast. That would be cowardly. I simply feel that the lit
tle ones are comforted by my presence as the great purple leviathan rages across the floors of our castle, my person fighting and dragging it with all her might in a valiant effort to subdue the cacaphonous thing. 

We were safely in the spare room when I looked around and realized that I had abandoned my newest subject to the mercy of the beast. I crept quietly down the hall (again, not afraid-my only thought to launch a surprise attack on the thing) and I could not believe my eyes. There sat the yellow one, reclined under the banquet hall table, SLEEPING!
There is only one conclusion that can be drawn from this reckless disregard for her own life, dear readers. I leave you with this certainty- The yellow one is DAFT."

Chapter One, Page Four

"What a pleasant day my person and I had. She was very attentive and we had a rousing game of Binky. Later on in the evening, we had quite a long walk. I stayed close to my person because it seems to make her happy. When we returned home, the wrinkled person patted me and made some very amusing sounds, the only one of which I under
stood was my name, Boo. Even the yellow one did not annoy me to any great measure.

On the subject of sounds made by persons, I often wonder if they have some sort of rudimentary language. Surely no other in the animal kingdom makes so many sounds that do not seem to have specific import. I do know the noise, 'awf' means they are not pleased with where I am sitting, but it also means 'do not jump on me'. And of course, they do have sounds for us all. I am 'Boo' sometimes repeated twice, and the yellow one is 'Lola' and the two tiny things are 'Danny' and 'Katie'. Other than these sounds, it seems as if they are imitating the sound of the river rushing over rocks. Wouldn't it be a wonderful thing if they could someday learn to bark? A foolish thought, that many dogs have had before.

Despite her limitations, I love my person, and the other two that reside here in my castle. I anticipate tomorrow will be just as satisfactory, provided the Canine Mastery woman does not make an appearance. Goodnight, dear readers. Until tomorrow I remain your benevolent ruler,

Boo Radley

Chapter One, Page Three.

"I made my person cry today. I do not understand what that silly woman is doing. The yellow one they call Lola came in to the house. I promptly frightened her-women must be kept in their place. I did not even break the skin on that silly beast and my person was very rude to me. However, I did not let that stop me from showing my supe
riority. My person's mother touched my collar so I gave her a fierce snarl and some severe barking. I was then VERY RUDELY corrected. Dear reader, I was quite taken aback. Especially when she became so emotional. Unsure of how to proceed. I have decided to be very affectionate this evening, as I want her to know I am a forgiving king. Again, further study is required.