Saturday, May 3, 2014

Volume 2-Page Eight

Today we went to the far away meadow again. Much Binky throwing, and the yellow one behaved herself quite nicely. At the approach of a small golden-haired dog, I did become cross momentarily, but quickly reconsidered my position. Although our circumstances are not ideal, our kingdom must go on. As monarch, I am the glue that holds my subjects' together.

In our temporary kingdom, there is a great white and brindle female who visits us often. She is a funny looking thing, with a short wrinkled muzzle and large jaws. She hasn't the grace and streamlined elegance of the yellow one, but there is something quite appealing in her tall, heavily muscled frame and strange eyes, the color of an unclouded sky. I am undecided as to whether she is friend or foe. The small blue feline is also a puzzle. He appears to believe that he is king over this strange new territory. What an odd thing that would be, a feline ruler. He is quite savvy and sure of himself however, sitting just on the other side of the castle walls and gazing at the yellow one and I with not a whit of fear in his yellow eyes. I quite think he would make a formidable opponent despite his stature. Feline monarchy-perhaps it is not such a far-fetched idea. Barring any dogs who are up to the task, of course.

Yours in quiet contemplation,
Boo Radley

Volume 2, Page Seven

Dear readers, the yellow one and I are very concerned. Our person left us for quite some time, a whole day and night. I cannot understand her noises but I do gather that something frightening has happened. The yellow one has barked herself hoarse, and I am ashamed to say that I was very harsh with her upon our person's return. I was angry that she attempted to garner all my person's attention, and I do confess that I turned upon her very rudely. I was corrected severely and I admit I deserved it. I am a king, but not a tyrant. I should have kept calm during our time of crisis, and I did not.

However, I did my best to be pleasant to the yellow one during our romp in the meadow and I believe I have soothed her hurt feelings. My person, of course, is as loving and attentive as ever. It as if she hasn't the capacity to remember even the most immediate past events. It must be quite simple to be a person-I envy them that.

Yours remorsefully,
Boo Radley

Volume 2, Page Six

Another trip to the big meadow today, where we encountered a very unpleasant little female dog. She seems to be confused regarding the span of my kingdom. It will be a dark day when I let a nasty creature like that usurp my lands. However I did receive a harsh rebuke for attempting to dispatch her, and so I allowed my person to step in and deal with the issue. She felt it best that we retreat to the other end of the meadow. She is a silly person, but she is mine, and so I did as she asked of me.

I do enjoy the rides in the great snorting person wagon however. Unfortunate that the yellow one acts like a fool, climbing to and fro from the front of the wagon to the back. It is a wagon. What could possibly be more interesting up front? I prefer to rest quietly until we arrive at our destination, but then, I am a more experienced traveler. All in all it was an interesting if not completely pleasant day. We shall see what tomorrow brings.

Volume 2, Page Five

Today my person show marked improvement in her behavior. We went to the big meadow and there were many wonderful smells, although I spent quite a lot of time marking the territory. I shall not stand for any encroachment upon my meadow, far as it may be from the castle. There was much tossing of the Binky, and the agreeable small male person who sometimes visits gave rousing chase several times. Of course the yellow one came along, and daftly ran about sniffing the ground and making her ridiculous snuffling noises. She has no desire to chase the Binky, only to swoop in and steal it when my person is not keeping watch. I used to punish her but now I just let it pass. It must be horrible to be that foolish. I am quite exhausted and now shall bed down at my person's feet for my night's rest.

Yours contentedly,
Boo Radley

Volume 2-Page Four

My person stayed away all evening. To show my displeasure I am refusing to play Binky. Hopefully she repents of her folly and we can start anew tomorrow.

Yours firmly,
Boo Radley

Volume 2-Page Three

Dear readers, only yesterday I wished for new evening games, but I am quite perplexed at what I received in answer.

My person placed my Binky on my nose! I do not understand this. A Binky goes in one's mouth. It is for throwing, chewing, and fetching. What is the purpose of balancing it on my face? Nevertheless, I did as she asked and sat still while ridiculously balancing the Binky. She made this noise first "WAIT". Then she barked a noise "GO" and I knew she wanted me to flip the Binky off of my nose and catch it, so of course I did. She and all the persons in the house clapped her paws together and made their short barks of happiness, so it would seem this new game pleases them very much.

I will never, never understand persons.

Yours in befuddlement,
Boo Radley

Volume 2-Page Two

It was a pleasant and uneventful day today. My person spoke of taking the yellow one and I to "thedogpark" which is a pleasant meadow with wonderful smells. I was looking forward to the outing, but then water poured from the sky and we were castle bound for the day. My person promptly fell asleep after tossing the Binky for a small time. I did not mind, as I myself enjoy a lazy nap at her feet. I have been extremely attentive, in an attempt to express my forgiveness for her interlude with the tall one. It would be so much easier if she could bark, but alas persons are limited in their intelligence when it comes to communication.

I spent a great deal of the day remembering my valiant foe, the Canine Masterywoman. Oh, how I long to meet her in battle again some day. Perhaps it shall be soon. I tire of repeating the same evening games over and over, especially when I saw that the tall one had learned more games than I. That cut me to the quick, dear readers. I cannot lie. To think that silly female is more advanced than myself...well. It is quite insulting.

But tomorrow is another day, and I shall do my best to engage my person in some new evening games. For now, I am content here at her feet, Binky in mouth, ruler of all I survey.

Yours faithfully,
Boo Radley

Volume 2-Page One

It has been many, many days since I last spoke to you, dear readers. I return now in great celebration, and with good news. The tall one who has so rudely monopolized my person's time has left the castle, never to return.

Mind you, I bear no ill will toward her. The giant creature more closely resembled a hooved beast of the plains than a dog. What my person saw in her, I will never know. How could she forsake me for that galloping long-tongued creature? But I am not here to air my grievances. I have forgiven my person in totality. Truth be told, it is more a sign of weakness than magnanimity. What king would I be without my right hand beside me? Who should toss the Binky, if not she? Who should rub my belly, bring my food, make those silly person noises? I shudder to think. A kingdom without her would be empty and meaningless.

The yellow one still drives me to distraction, of course. Only yesterday she boldly snatched a Binky from me as I lay sleeping. If not for her fetching face I should surely banish her from this place! The little yellow one has been trying my patience as well, of late. She continues to bark at the approach of strangers, when she KNOWS full well that my person cannot abide her squeaky sounds of attack. I blame it all on the tall one. Now that she has traveled on, I feel certain things will improve immensely. My person shall worship me and wait on me hand and foot, the yellow one will stop her nonsense, and I shall have "hotdogs" at every meal.

Well, perhaps that is asking a bit much of my subjects. I shall settle for more time spent with the Binky and trips in the great shuddering person wagon on occasion. It is good to be king.

Yours with much relief,
Boo Radley


Boo Radley's diary, volume II. First installment in less than thirty. Hope he's got still got some readers out there, I'm too tired to do this for my own entertainment HA